The last month plays like a dream now. I am not sure where the things to touch are and what parts I have simply conjured. Robert and Chicago and Asheville and Tom Waits. As Robert said on the way to the airport, it is hard to believe that we actually saw him. That we were in the same room. I cannot even remember all of the details now, it is just a bright ambient light, a sense of warmth, yet still like a dream.
I thought it could not be topped until Saturday night. I don’t romanticize our evening. I don’t think it necessarily means something concrete. It’s was comfortable, and relaxed and old in that good way. I had forgotten how you felt in my arms. How it felt for you to be holding me. I forgot how well we sleep together. I don’t think I have slept that well in a while.
I have dreamt of that night many times in the last year. I wondered would I ever be back in that bed, under that comforter, sidled beside you. In the sense that it happened it was the realization of those dreams, and thus dreamlike too.
I do hope it wasn’t the last time. I can’t believe right now that it is. I could spend my life sleeping beside you.
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