I’m having the after lunch cigarette and reading my book about the 60s around-the-world sailing race, when he walked up, looking like he had taken a hammer rather than a toothbrush to his teeth.
“What’s that book about?”
I show him the cover, A Voyage for Madmen.
“Ah… vo…age…for…madame… What’s it about?”
“About these Europeans who raced each other in a solo non-stop sailing race around the world in the 1960s.”
“Sailing?”
“Yeah, with boats that have sails on them?”
“Oh yeah, that reminds me of… what’s his name?… You know who I am talking about… What’s his name?”
“I don’t know.”
“You know!… What’s his name?…. It’s uh… It’s uh… Oh, that’s right… Columbus!”
“Well he was an explorer and sailor. Not really in a race around the world. But I see what you are saying.”
“Yeah, Columbus. Just like him. Have you ever raced an ostrich?”
“An ostrich? No.”
“What about an elephant?”
“No not an elephant either.”
“A horse?”
“I’ve ridden horses before, but not in a race.”
“I’ve raced all three.”
“Really!?!?!?”

“Yeah, that ostrich, you gotta hold on tight. It runs like 100 miles per hour and bounces while it does it. Grab hold around that neck and hold on.”
“Elephants go faster tan you think too. You have to hold on tight. Grab hold to them big ears and hold on. Got hit by a tree limb while I was on that. See. There. That scar on the back of y head came from the tree limb and that elephant. Don’t want to fall of one. Hold on to them ears.”
“I’m from the country. South Georgia. I know animals. You ever wrestled and alligator.”
“Nope, I haven’t done that either.”
“It’s easy. You just grab ’em like this around the mouth and hold on tight. If they start to roll around, you just roll with ’em until they get tired out.”
“Interesting.”
“Oh yeah. And their heart is right behind their head. Did you know that?”
“No I didn’t.”
“Yeah, once they get tired, you pull out your knife and stick in right into the heart, behind the head, and you just twist, and they’re gone.”
“Wow. Well I’ve got to get back to work now.”
“Where you work?”
“CNN.”
“You a producer, editor, something like that?”
“I’m a designer.”
“Oh, that means you design. Cool… Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Can I get one of them cigarettes?”
“Sure.”
“A light.”
“Sure. Talk to you later.”
“Can I ask you one more thing? I know you are going to say no.”
“Well, why are you asking if you know what my answer is going to be?”
“Can I get some change? I’m trying to catch the MARTA train and I need a litte more change. Can I have some?”
“No.”